Feeling so lonely

I am feeling so lonely today and I think I will not be able to study today. My crush was looking so beautiful and I don't even got a look from her and it is really long time since she ever cared to look at me. I am feeling so sad and scare that I might lose her to any other boy.

I don't have any guts to tell her. She is with her friends or in a crowded place and I might not able to even talk to her in my whole life and any extrovert boy can get her with their charm while I will always be a loser and not anything else.

I try to become talkative with or try to be oversmart but I am not even a smart and goodlooking. I don't have any hope of any job in my life because my grades are really poor and I am also not good in sports and whatever that is wanted I am not good at it. I am a complete loser and I have to admit it seriously.

A few people try to motivate me but I am just what I am and I don't think I can change. However I was once a brilliant student and was counted in top three of my class. But after coming to college I don't know what happened to me I feel so lonely and frustrated and I really don't know why.

I live alone in a small room listening to people partying ,talking to their friends,laughing and killing me from inside unintentionally. I don't think I can do anything in my life. This introvercy is kind of becoming a curse to me and I also don't think that I will be any good as extrovert.

I have a strong urge to go home because there are my parents and atleast they love me. I will advice to anyone that if you don't think anyone loves you just have a look at your parents. I am only living for my parents otherwise I would have died long ago. I just care for them because they are the only ones who care for me,who love me.

I don't told you to read this post because this is my personal blog and if you think I am overreacting ,seriously get lost. And if you don't have any problem and understand me then just leave you advice in comments box.